I See Things In Blue Series by Samuel Alexander

Dario suffers from anxiety and depression mixed with a toxic desire to please his parents. Although an overachiever in all things, he can't get the approval he craves; never believing he could be good enough for them. His friends try to help him realise he's okay as is, but nothing they do works. Eventually, something beyond his control forces Dario to the conclusion that all he'd worked for no longer mattered... moreDario suffers from anxiety and depression mixed with a toxic desire to please his parents. Although an overachiever in all things, he can't get the approval he craves; never believing he could be good enough for them. His friends try to help him realise he's okay as is, but nothing they do works. Eventually, something beyond his control forces Dario to the conclusion that all he'd worked for no longer mattered. Will the damage of Dario's past stop him from full acceptance or will he push through to find the man he buried. less

Gavin is helping one of his best friends, Dario, navigate through depression with the help of another friend, Rayland. The three did everything together until high school ruined the bond. Something happened to Gavin that puts his friendship with Dario at risk. When it came down to the choice between their friendship and his own feelings, Gavin chose himself... moreGavin is helping one of his best friends, Dario, navigate through depression with the help of another friend, Rayland. The three did everything together until high school ruined the bond. Something happened to Gavin that puts his friendship with Dario at risk. When it came down to the choice between their friendship and his own feelings, Gavin chose himself. Was it the best choice? Can the damage he did to Dario be undone? Will he ever get a chance to deal with the pain that led to the decision? Will he tell Dario what hurt him so bad he'd risk their friendship? Or will he bury it so deep he becomes numb to the pain? Gavin doesn't have the answers, he only knows that this one choice may be his biggest regret in life. less

Rayland has big dreams of Broadway superstardom and the spunky determination to get her there. Sometimes feisty and aggressive but that’s part of her charm. Her two best friends, Dario and Gavin, have their own opinions about this charm. Chasing her dreams comes naturally. The harder task is dealing with Dario’s depression and helping him realise his worth... moreRayland has big dreams of Broadway superstardom and the spunky determination to get her there. Sometimes feisty and aggressive but that’s part of her charm. Her two best friends, Dario and Gavin, have their own opinions about this charm. Chasing her dreams comes naturally. The harder task is dealing with Dario’s depression and helping him realise his worth. But when his friendship with Gavin breaks up for the second time and Dario starts to spiral out of control will she be enough? Is it her fault the second split happened? Can she help him without Gavin, or will she lose Dario to depression and anxiety forever? This series should be read in order due to different vantage points over the same timelines. less

Kevin’s life was fairly standard and hectic. The fifth out of nine children there was never a shortage of excitement in the house. But his real joy came in building things. If he could describe heaven, it would be a place with unlimited access to power tools filled with the smell of sawdust and metal. Confident in his sexuality and sometimes a bit aggressive his journey into adulthood was running as smoothly as it could. That is until highschool... moreKevin’s life was fairly standard and hectic. The fifth out of nine children there was never a shortage of excitement in the house. But his real joy came in building things. If he could describe heaven, it would be a place with unlimited access to power tools filled with the smell of sawdust and metal. Confident in his sexuality and sometimes a bit aggressive his journey into adulthood was running as smoothly as it could. That is until highschool. His first day of school Kevin witnesses an incident with another student. Something seems off about the altercation but no one else notices. Still, Kevin can’t get this scene nor the student out of his mind. He’s convinced he’s right regardless if no one else believes it. Then one day he gets the opportunity to test his theory and the situation he finds himself in is something that even he did not expect. This series should be read in order due to different vantage points over the same timelines. less

Dario has had a rough year full of angst, anxiety, and depression. After years of trying to be the son he thought his parents wanted he is finally free to be himself, but he doesn't know who he is. Dario is used to the structure his false yet perfect life brought, and his new freedom puts him far out of his element. Still, he has more things to worry about. Funny, confident, and chocolate, Kevin is the friend Dario would never have before and seems to effortlessly break through all his defences... moreDario has had a rough year full of angst, anxiety, and depression. After years of trying to be the son he thought his parents wanted he is finally free to be himself, but he doesn't know who he is. Dario is used to the structure his false yet perfect life brought, and his new freedom puts him far out of his element. Still, he has more things to worry about. Funny, confident, and chocolate, Kevin is the friend Dario would never have before and seems to effortlessly break through all his defences. Giving in to the emotions Kevin stirs in him goes against everything Dario has been running from but now, when he no longer has to run, will he take the leap into the unknown? Does he even have a choice? The only thing that seems certain is all roads all roads lead to Kevin. NOTE: This part in the series picks up where the last left off. It's recomended you read the series in order. less

Having been raised in the system, Louis never envisioned he’d have the life he had: A loving partner, his dream job bringing music into the world and three children, four if you counted Dario; a shy, anxious and extremely talented student who didn’t recognise his worth. Louis stepped in to be his father when Dario’s own had failed him. Still, as the years went on and Dario sunk deeper into depression, Louis began to question if his efforts were working... moreHaving been raised in the system, Louis never envisioned he’d have the life he had: A loving partner, his dream job bringing music into the world and three children, four if you counted Dario; a shy, anxious and extremely talented student who didn’t recognise his worth. Louis stepped in to be his father when Dario’s own had failed him. Still, as the years went on and Dario sunk deeper into depression, Louis began to question if his efforts were working. Would Dario ever get better? Would he stop trying to earn the love his parents would not give? Would he ever embrace his true self and learn to love him? So many unanswered questions but amongst all the uncertainty the biggest fear was what would happen if Louis didn’t try to save him; that he might lose Dario, forever. less

Anxious, nervous, and a bit on edge, Dario is stepping into his new normal. Trying to embrace his true self is a daunting task: his non-relationship with his father goes further south; he can’t seem to get past the walls he built to hide from himself and his parents, and the closer he gets to the goal the harder it seems to attain. Despite the depressing odds, Dario moves forward intent on taking Kevin with him. Kevin is funny, confident and all sorts of cute... moreAnxious, nervous, and a bit on edge, Dario is stepping into his new normal. Trying to embrace his true self is a daunting task: his non-relationship with his father goes further south; he can’t seem to get past the walls he built to hide from himself and his parents, and the closer he gets to the goal the harder it seems to attain. Despite the depressing odds, Dario moves forward intent on taking Kevin with him. Kevin is funny, confident and all sorts of cute. He sees the greatness in Dario that Dario’s friends have been trying to make him see in himself for years. Kevin finds the real Dario before even he can. The way Dario feels around Kevin is new, strange, and exciting. What they share should be fun but anxiety and Dario’s old belief system threaten to kill this connection before it begins. Will his parents' influence continue to block his efforts with Kevin? Will the damage of the fake Dario undo his efforts to become whole? Is freedom only a dream and not something for him to own? These are just some of Dario's fears, but there is one truth he can latch onto; if Kevin could find the person buried deep inside of him, why couldn’t he? NOTE: This is the final instalment in the series and it picks up exactly where the previous ended. It's recommended to read this series in order as some parts are also different vantage points over the same time. less