Smirk Series by Jen Luerssen

Hey there, beautiful! I’m Joe, just Joe, not like that asshole with a heart of gold, F*cking Frank. Hope you’re not too disappointed that I kept my abs under wraps, I’m no show off. Check out the guns, though, am I right? Really, my abs would have distracted you too much away from my handsome face, and that would have been a travesty. I am the full package—handsome, built, funny, charming. You could say I’m a little full of myself, but I’m just honest... moreHey there, beautiful! I’m Joe, just Joe, not like that asshole with a heart of gold, F*cking Frank. Hope you’re not too disappointed that I kept my abs under wraps, I’m no show off. Check out the guns, though, am I right? Really, my abs would have distracted you too much away from my handsome face, and that would have been a travesty. I am the full package—handsome, built, funny, charming. You could say I’m a little full of myself, but I’m just honest. We are always told to build our self confidence and believe in ourselves. Then you agree when someone compliments you and you’re some kind of monster. Wait until you meet Betsy, she’s amazing and I’m sure you’ll love her. She’s a stripper, oh shit, I mean she’s a burlesque dancer. Please don’t tell her I messed that up. She hates when I call her a stripper. She’s also a f*cking genius computer whiz. Betsy hired me and my construction company to renovate her house. I’m a musician but I also really like making people’s homes up to date, plus it pays a shit ton. Bets and I have friend-zoned each other but I secretly have the hots for her. My brother, Jack thinks I’m crazy for just being friends, but he’s only 18 and was raised by me, so he clearly knows nothing. Or maybe he’s the smart one. I think you should get this book and see what happens, or at least get it for the perfection that is the cover, ya know, me. less

Salty? I mean, it’s better than “f*cking” or “just” but I think it paints an inaccurate picture of my genial personality. I’m assuming that “sexy” or “sophisticated” were too pedestrian or already taken. Joe tells me that I can pretend it’s about how I taste. I ignore that affable deviant as much as possible. Generally, I’m a pretty easy going and friendly guy. My new intern, Kit calls me “Salty” and so I guess it’s a thing now. Joe says I tend to act like an ass around women I’m attracted to... moreSalty? I mean, it’s better than “f*cking” or “just” but I think it paints an inaccurate picture of my genial personality. I’m assuming that “sexy” or “sophisticated” were too pedestrian or already taken. Joe tells me that I can pretend it’s about how I taste. I ignore that affable deviant as much as possible. Generally, I’m a pretty easy going and friendly guy. My new intern, Kit calls me “Salty” and so I guess it’s a thing now. Joe says I tend to act like an ass around women I’m attracted to. Am I attracted to Kit? Hell yes and in the past I’ve treated her very well. Several times in one night as a matter of fact. A night we didn’t exchange real names or numbers, it was Vegas, for fuck’s sake. Maybe I’m a tiny bit salty that I find that the co-owner of my winery, Mikey, hired Kit as our new intern. I’m not the type of guy who sleeps with his interns. If being stuck working with a woman I’ve been intimate with, who is amazing at her job, yet treats me like I gave her chlamydia pushes me a little in the salty category, then I guess that’s an apt description. Despite her clear displeasure with me now, Kit was once happy in my company. I’m just going to have to figure out if it’s worth making her happy again. less