Midlife Olympians Series by T.J. Deschamps

When the fake fortune teller receives the gift of the oracle, of course there’s strings attached. Olympic-sized strings.Some people get Green Eggs and Ham as a bedtime story, I got tales of gods and Titans, nymphs, demigods, and Oracles. My Greek grandparents not only told me stories. They were so proud of their culture and heritage, making sure I was fluent in both reading and writing the language.I thought I knew who I was, my heritage, my culture, my destiny... moreWhen the fake fortune teller receives the gift of the oracle, of course there’s strings attached. Olympic-sized strings.Some people get Green Eggs and Ham as a bedtime story, I got tales of gods and Titans, nymphs, demigods, and Oracles. My Greek grandparents not only told me stories. They were so proud of their culture and heritage, making sure I was fluent in both reading and writing the language.I thought I knew who I was, my heritage, my culture, my destiny.All of that changed when a Titan named Dione walked through the door of my divination shop. For so many years, I’d thought I’d been scamming people by reading their fortunes. Turns out I’m the real deal. Dione says a fortune, a job as Oracle to the Gods, and the deed to a property in a small town near the Washington Olympics awaits.The problem is, the cops are after me for Carlo’s latest scam, scary monsters want to kidnap me, and everyone who takes the post of Oracle to the Olympians dies mysteriously.Who knew going legit would be so dangerous? less

When I quit my job as a fake fortuneteller to become Oracle, of course there were strings attached. Olympic-sized strings.A modern epic of Homeric proportions with belly laughs and ibuprofen chasersI’m adjusting to my life as Oracle with new friends, a pet monster, and a smoking hot god at my side. Things are looking up and I’m learning the ropes. Mostly.The lights go out every time I access my oracular gift... moreWhen I quit my job as a fake fortuneteller to become Oracle, of course there were strings attached. Olympic-sized strings.A modern epic of Homeric proportions with belly laughs and ibuprofen chasersI’m adjusting to my life as Oracle with new friends, a pet monster, and a smoking hot god at my side. Things are looking up and I’m learning the ropes. Mostly.The lights go out every time I access my oracular gift. Since the time of Pythia in Delphi, the Oracle’s worth and her life depended upon how she delivered the news to gods and kings. With Dione locked up, I can’t exactly ask her how to do it—not that I would trust her after what she did to my ancestors.My only choice is to trust Hermes and my new friends and divulge my secret weakness. After all my ex put me through, can I do that?While I’m searching for answers, another god seeks me out. I’m dragged to Atlantis where Poseidon reigns and the tech is fishy. When I’m there, Atlantis faces an attack. An ancient enemy of the king of sea has emerged and she’s brought friends.Learning to do battle on the job was not something no other Oracle ever had to worry about. Good thing I’m a harpy queen and have enough bottled rage to screech across the realms, calling a winged army to my side.Will my golden girls be enough to face the new threat while the bigger threat of breaching the gates of Tartarus looms? less

When a fake fortune teller receives the gift of the oracle, of course there's strings attached, Olympic-sized strings.I'm getting the knack of this oracle thing, harpy screeching, and lightning bolt flinging; too bad my gifts are attracting the wrong kind of attention. Typhon, Echidna, and a few other monstrous titans have escaped Tartarus. Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades are all acting like man-babies over whose fault it is and who should take care of the problem. But, that's not the worst of it... moreWhen a fake fortune teller receives the gift of the oracle, of course there's strings attached, Olympic-sized strings.I'm getting the knack of this oracle thing, harpy screeching, and lightning bolt flinging; too bad my gifts are attracting the wrong kind of attention. Typhon, Echidna, and a few other monstrous titans have escaped Tartarus. Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades are all acting like man-babies over whose fault it is and who should take care of the problem. But, that's not the worst of it.Carlo was exonerated for his crimes, and he wants his wife back. Lucky me. He knows my past dirt and supes have to be on the up and up or I.S.E.A. (International Supernatural Enforcement Agency) will crack down. If he stirs trouble, I might get deported to Olympus.I've got to stop my monstrous ex before the so-called monsters like me get the boot. less